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~ A place to find answers to gnawing spiritual questions ~



Question: Okay, well I was just wondering is it a sin for a 14 year old to be kissy with boys? I don't know you and you don't know me. I just found this sight on the internet. Thanks!

Answer: I am so glad you found us on the Internet. I think that I can help answer your question. I do hope that you are teachable and willing to hear me out. You are right, I do not know you, but I do know what young people go through. I was your age once, and I know the temptations and problems that you face as a young person, so please, take what I say very seriously. I believe if you do, you will be a happy young person who will avoid many of the terrible problems that others your age are going through all because they would not listen to godly advice.

You are at the age when average girls do start 'liking' boys. This is NORMAL. God gave you these desires. The thing you must keep in mind is, that if you get involved physically with boys (i.e. kissing, petting, 'making-out') before God says you are to, you will find yourself with problems that you may never get over. These problems include such things as emotional problems like guilt and physical problems like sexually transmitted diseases and even out of wedlock pregnancy.

You must get to know a young man emotionally and spiritually first, and wait for any form of sex for marriage. This is God's plan. If a young man really likes (Loves you), he will respect your body by not touching it in a wrong and inappropriate manner.

Let me explain further.

When you begin to get 'physical' with the opposite sex, you start something that you may not be able to control. Kissing most always leads to 'petting' (putting your hands on the other person's private areas), then this usually leads to having other forms of sex. God never intended for this to occur outside of marriage. God calls this sin, the sin of fornication.

Listen; you are a beautiful person that was made for God. He has a plan for your life. He also has a husband waiting for you somewhere 'down the line'. Your body is for your husband to enjoy when you get married, and I believe this includes your lips (i.e. kissing).

I know that I may sound old fashioned, but I know what I am talking about. I went through the boyfriend- girlfriend 'game', and to be honest, I regret it now. I am happily married, and wish that I had never kissed anyone else besides my wife. I got into very hurtful relationships and did things that I now know were not right in God's sight; all because I got physically involved with the girls, instead of just being friends with them.

I strongly advise that you give your life to Jesus if you haven't as of yet; When you ask Jesus into your heart and you make Him Lord of your life, he becomes your best friend who will help guide you through life; and then finally, when you die, you get to go to His heaven where you will spend eternity in the most wonderful place. You should go to a good Bible believing church in your area; find good Christian friends, and before you know it, you will be out of high school, and in time God will bring 'Mister Right' into your life. It is the greatest way to live.

Someone once said about the matter of kissing before marriage, "One thing leads to another! The easiest way to stop is not to begin". The Bible says, "Keep thyself pure". This means sexually pure too! My dear friend, if you listen to God's Word, you will have a very happy and fulfilling life (Psalm 1:1-3).

A good book on this subject is called "Why Wait?" by Josh McDowell. You can probably get it through your public library if you ask.


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Last updated February 5, 2014.

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